Beta
by silverstarredsky
Summary: You were your dream self, a concept of a game that no longer existed, a beta. You were not the alpha John, you were the beta, a test run, and you were not meant to survive in this alpha timeline. Sadstuck; no pairings. Oneshot.


_A/N: First fanfiction!_

_. . . It's pretty terrible, I know._  
_It's based on the fact that the beta kids are betas in a beta timeline and therefore should die off pretty soon because they aren't the alphas, and the fact that John's title is the heir of breath - he becomes breath. If it's not clear, in the end, that's exactly what happens._  
_Also, he feels the symptoms first because he never became his dream-self - it's still considered a dream self that went god tier, and therefore a game construct._  
_… Everyone ends up dying, in the end. The sprites die first, , then Dave and Rose - they make it to the alpha universe before John does because their ship never slows down. Then Jade - she's god tier, but still a sprite and a guardian. John dies last. The trolls are the alpha trolls and are the only ones to make it to the alpha universe._

_This is unedited and just stream of consciousness writing, so there's bound to be spelling and grammar errors and semicolon and dash abuse._

_Constructive criticism is very much appreciated!_

* * *

It was clear that they you weren't going to make it. At first, it was small things - the sprites being less active than normal, the consorts becoming sick, the ship beginning to slow down.

As the days turned into months, there was a feeling of fatigue at the back of your mind. You'd shake it off, go play on the computer or only to find it there, trying to weigh you down. At times you had to stop, in the middle of something you were doing. You'd pass out and wake up in dreambubbles - but even there you were carrying an extra three hundred pounds. You couldn't really sleep in the bubbles, but that didn't mean you couldn't feel exhausted. You'd lie there in the middle of who-the-fuck-cares and try to move, only to be stuck in one spot for what felt like hours. You'd wake up in your house with a plate of glowing blue cookies beside your bed (to tell the truth, you never ate them; they were too similar to cake and they were blue - you knew that couldn't be healthy).

Of course, there were days when it got better. Most days on the ship, it would only be a weak presence floating around somewhere that you couldn't reach. Even so, you made sure to avoid a situation where passing out would be very, very bad. You didn't want to end up in lava - even though you're pretty much immortal, you guessed it would hurt. A lot. And what if you were stuck there, not able to die, but your body burning up every time it regenerated?

The day you noticed you could no longer use your god-tier powers was the day you knew something was wrong. You had been around LOLAR and you just…fell. Next thing you knew, you were in the middle of Rose's room, lying in a pile of rubble you guessed had fallen from the roof after you had… crashed through it. You couldn't exactly say that was normal.

Jade brought you out of LOLAR pretty fast after that. You were confused; why did you fall? Jade told you that the wind had just stopped. You tried to control it again, on the ship. No luck. Over the next couple of months, you and Jade tried everything - you could barely even make a breeze, and that was iffy. Jade still seemed strong, though, and you wondered, did god tier powers have limits? Did they fade over time? You didn't go to any of the planets after that, though; you didn't want to be stuck as mini-John for the rest of your life.

You were nearing 30 months aboard that god-damn spaceship. Jade had brought your bed out from your house, and you spent more time in it than not - there were times when you wouldn't wake up for days. You'd spend more and more time in dreambubbles; eventually you could control where you'd go in them, and which memories to visit. You'd often go back to your house before Sburb, talk with your father, talk with your chums, and on the days you had enough energy, you'd play out scenarios where Sburb never happened, you'd burned your copy and your friends had done the same. Sometimes it would turn into a boring but pleasant life - you'd grow up, marry a nice girl (once it had been Rose, but you swear on your life you'll never tell anyone), have a family. Sometimes it was a nightmare, seeing your whole world end in fire, caused by some other idiots playing the game. You vaguely wondered if that was just an alternate reality - maybe those players were real; experiencing their own dreambubbles. Maybe they were actually you, in an alternate timeline. Whatever. You didn't care.

When one day you woke up and all you found beside you was a note with fading blue ink, you knew you were going to die. It was definitely from Nannasprite - but as you stared at it, the words were disappearing. You got up and took a look around, but saw no sign of her. You'd guessed something like this would happen - their universe and session no longer existed - it was surprising they had lived this long. In fact, you hadn't seen Jaspers or Davesprite for weeks. You shed no tears - your nanna was probably alive in the alpha session, perhaps you'd even get to meet her and become friends again. Jaspers…was a cat, and although Davesprite was your… friend, you knew you had the real Dave out there somewhere, hopefully. Jade was in the control room, crying over a note she found written in orange. You tried your best to console her, but when you noticed she no longer had her dog ears, you couldn't take it - you passed out there.

Jade was trying to spend extra time with you, you noticed, but she was weak and tired. You noticed she wasn't even going back and forth between planets, and you wondered if her powers had disappeared as well. She reluctantly explained that she had gone through what you had, albeit at a much faster rate. Soon she was bedridden, and you were doing what you could. It wasn't enough, and you could tell nothing you could do was going to make any difference.

Jade was gone. One day she was lying there in her bed, the next, gone. You searched for her, but just like the sprites, there was no trace. Nothing of hers remained. You guessed it made sense - she was a sprite gone god-tier, made from a god-dog that was guardian to a non-existent planet in a non-existent universe. That didn't stop you from bawling your eyes out for two weeks straight. Your ecto-sister was dead. You started spending more time asleep, in dreambubbles of her memories.

You were four years into this journey - without Jade, the ship had begun to lose momentum, but it wasn't stopping anytime soon. You found a stash of food in a room on the ship; Jade had been anticipating this and stockpiled lots of food and water. It wasn't as though you needed it - you were immortal, but it was nice to have something to soothe your aching stomach. You were now asleep more than you were awake - sometimes you just lost consciousness, and didn't even visit a dreambubble. You suspected when that happened, you were dying.

The window was fast approaching. You didn't need to look out to know that. There was a tingling sensation in your fingers that fast spread to the rest of your body. You were afraid to look, afraid to see yourself disappearing, if that was what was even happening. You opened your eyes but couldn't focus on anything, but you could tell you were definitely not solid. You tried to sit up, but the tingling turned your body into a wobbly mess, and suddenly you were scared. Scared beyond all reason. You were alone on this ship, approaching a barrier that will probably kill you, and you were feeling yourself die, or fade, or whatever was happening.

It made sense, you supposed. You were your dream self, a concept of a game that no longer existed, a beta. You wondered how the others were doing; you hadn't heard from them in years. You didn't want to think they were probably experiencing the same thing as you, if they were still alive. You were not the alpha John, you were the beta, a test run, and you were not meant to survive in this alternate timeline. You wonder what happens after you fade. Do you go to heaven? Is heaven even real? You hoped so, you didn't want to disappear forever you didn't want to go, but all you could do was lie there and await impact, await your death, await whatever happens afterwards.

Your name is John Egbert and the last thing you feel is a weak breeze blowing softly through your hair and lifting you away.


End file.
